February 17, 2010

it was just sex...

Last night, I had a dream about someone I know. In my dream, we had a torrid affair. (I've always wanted to use that word. Torrid. Much better than turgid.) There was something demolishing about the fact that we gave in to these desires—even though we both knew we shouldn't. Which is so funny to me because I can't even have a fucking fling in my unconscious. You know? My brain kicks in and throws guilt and dismay into the mix.

But the sex—well, at one point, when J. was on the phone with his wife, he said, "It was just sex." And that made me laugh because he's not a kinky guy. Not in real life and not in my dream. Until he met me and I changed all that.

What's funny also is that I was dressed the same as I was in my Lou Reed dream: black slacks, black button-up shirt, shiny black docs. Hair back in a ponytail. Fully contained in every way. And then I set about undoing everything this man holds to be true and dear. I made him treat me in a way that he didn't think he was capable of.

He spanked me. He tied me down. He fucked me.

I made him a dom and that incinerated his soul.

Oh, god. Maybe I'm the devil.



P.S. This is what I'd look like if I were a mudflap girl. Except with smaller tits.


Jo said...

A turgid affair would be so depressing. I mean, what a waste of an affair :)

I'm thinking you need to put the outfit on one day and see what happens...

angell said...

Ooooh I love that pendant.

I WANT I WANT I WANT I WANT I WANT I WANT *checks credit card balance*


Torrid affairs....sigh. Sounds lovely, even in fantasy.